Having a secure life will not going to happen in this country I living
Having a happy life with all 'man's best friend' will never going to happen in this country I living
Meet a normal and ideal man, get married and have a happy future in this country I living is a huge grand prize from God
Get pregnant, deliver and raising a baby safely with no bad influence from 'THEM" in this country I living is a huge blessing from God
Now, I do not think that I will get that 'gold cards' for all the above events to happen in my life, in this country I living. Thus, do not expect much from me. Except, If I was born and lived in another country .............. I might be the first in line who chase the gold cards for all events.
xoxo :'(
Seorang teman yg beragama Katolik mengikuti retreat dalam rangka pengobatan selama 3 hari. Setelah kembali, dia menceritakan apa yang dia dapat selama di sana.
Yang paling menarik untuk disimak adalah ceritanya mengenai pembahasan mengenai luka batin, yang mana sebenarnya mungkin ada dan tidak ada hubungan dengan penyakit yang mereka alami sekarang ini.
Salah seorang peserta yang ikut tenyata adalah seorang guru sekolah dan dia membagi pengalamannya selama dia mengajar, dan mengatakan bahwa sebenarnya setiap manusia, dari sejak bayi, sudah membawa luka batin dalam dirinya (well, selain dosa Adam dan Hawa tentunya).
Saat ditanya, "koq bisa? dari bayi? contohnya apa?" jawabnya, seperti halnya saat masa hamil, ada pergulatan orangtua bayi itu, apakah bayi tersebut akan dilahirkan atau malah di-aborsi. Katanya secara psikologis, sebenarnya bayi sudah bisa merasakan apa yang dirasakan oleh orangtua-nya, dan saat dia lahir dia membawa luka batin bahwa sebenarnya dahulu saat hamil, sang bayi sempat tidak diinginkan oleh orang tuanya.
Contoh luka batin yang paling banyak adalah karena luka akibat kekerasan orangtua terhadap anak. Secara sadar dan tak sadar, anak yang semasa kecil sering dipukuli oleh orang tuanya, akan membawa luka batin itu sampai mereka tua, dan akan mengulangi hal yang sama terhadap anaknya nanti.
Lalu, bagaimana cara menyembuhkan luka batin tersebut? tidak ada metode yang tepat dan sama untuk setiap orang, namun satu hal yang pasti adalah langkah pertama penyembuhan adalah orang itu harus bisa memaafkan sepenuh hati. Tentu saja, melupakan adalah hal yang berbeda, kecuali orang itu amnesia, rasanya setiap peristiwa yang terjadi dalam hidup seseorang akan menjadi sejarah dan akan sulit dilupakan karena sudah menjadi bagian dari diri orang itu.
Lalu, jika teringat hal itu, tentu saja rasa sakit dan luka batin itu akan timbul lagi bukan? ya, maka dari itu seorang suster menjawab, itulah gunanya retreat, saatnya bagi orang itu untuk me-re-charge kembali dan menghilangkan luka batin yang timbul tersebut.
Memang, luka batin sulit untuk disembuhkan, tapi rasanya bisa dipastikan, seiring berjalannya waktu, semakin kita berjalan menjauhi hal-hal yang mengingatkan kita akan luka batin itu, perlahan-lahan pasti kenangan itu akan pudar, dan tergantikan oleh kenangan-kenangan baru yang kita ciptakan di hari-hari depan.
Songsonglah hari baru dengan harapan baru, niscaya apa yang dilalui akan lebih berarti.
Pembelajaran yang baik dari sharing yang diberikan oleh seorang teman.
13 04 11
Yang paling menarik untuk disimak adalah ceritanya mengenai pembahasan mengenai luka batin, yang mana sebenarnya mungkin ada dan tidak ada hubungan dengan penyakit yang mereka alami sekarang ini.
Salah seorang peserta yang ikut tenyata adalah seorang guru sekolah dan dia membagi pengalamannya selama dia mengajar, dan mengatakan bahwa sebenarnya setiap manusia, dari sejak bayi, sudah membawa luka batin dalam dirinya (well, selain dosa Adam dan Hawa tentunya).
Saat ditanya, "koq bisa? dari bayi? contohnya apa?" jawabnya, seperti halnya saat masa hamil, ada pergulatan orangtua bayi itu, apakah bayi tersebut akan dilahirkan atau malah di-aborsi. Katanya secara psikologis, sebenarnya bayi sudah bisa merasakan apa yang dirasakan oleh orangtua-nya, dan saat dia lahir dia membawa luka batin bahwa sebenarnya dahulu saat hamil, sang bayi sempat tidak diinginkan oleh orang tuanya.
Contoh luka batin yang paling banyak adalah karena luka akibat kekerasan orangtua terhadap anak. Secara sadar dan tak sadar, anak yang semasa kecil sering dipukuli oleh orang tuanya, akan membawa luka batin itu sampai mereka tua, dan akan mengulangi hal yang sama terhadap anaknya nanti.
Lalu, bagaimana cara menyembuhkan luka batin tersebut? tidak ada metode yang tepat dan sama untuk setiap orang, namun satu hal yang pasti adalah langkah pertama penyembuhan adalah orang itu harus bisa memaafkan sepenuh hati. Tentu saja, melupakan adalah hal yang berbeda, kecuali orang itu amnesia, rasanya setiap peristiwa yang terjadi dalam hidup seseorang akan menjadi sejarah dan akan sulit dilupakan karena sudah menjadi bagian dari diri orang itu.
Lalu, jika teringat hal itu, tentu saja rasa sakit dan luka batin itu akan timbul lagi bukan? ya, maka dari itu seorang suster menjawab, itulah gunanya retreat, saatnya bagi orang itu untuk me-re-charge kembali dan menghilangkan luka batin yang timbul tersebut.
Memang, luka batin sulit untuk disembuhkan, tapi rasanya bisa dipastikan, seiring berjalannya waktu, semakin kita berjalan menjauhi hal-hal yang mengingatkan kita akan luka batin itu, perlahan-lahan pasti kenangan itu akan pudar, dan tergantikan oleh kenangan-kenangan baru yang kita ciptakan di hari-hari depan.
Songsonglah hari baru dengan harapan baru, niscaya apa yang dilalui akan lebih berarti.
Pembelajaran yang baik dari sharing yang diberikan oleh seorang teman.
13 04 11
I have a friend, she had boyfriend and had been working the relationship quite long, until it is time for them to take one step forward for the relationship. Make it legal, hmph it is sound so easy, so happy, so wonderful and can not wait to get there.
Now, they were married and they already have cute baby.
But, the road in front of them start to have some rocks blocking their way.
Some principle difference starting to become complicated thing to get settled with between them.
They started to shout out loud, speaking what is in their mind, they get quite a great fight, and at the end, when the situation become out of hand, there... the word come out as a weapon for each other "let's get divorce!!"
Who ho ho ho, wait a minute, their marriage life just about 1,5 years and the "D" word is so easily already spoken?
Hearing the problem they are dealing with, if I was the one who experience it, I might say the "D" word sooner.
Why? because I hate to debate on principle that I know very well that will never change, because any human can not be change in just one second, never, unless that someone realize it and willing to change it without any pressure.
Marriage is really really not the end of the relationship between a couple, but it is a beginning for the relationship to get stronger and stronger, and to make it happen, they will have to face huge of problems in their life.
if they are not strong enough, the relationship can end. Sadly, isn't it?
I hope and really hope, when it is my time, I have the courage to hold on to the relationship instead of letting it go.
I hope my partner can match me somehow, someway, to make it happen :)
Well, just another lesson to take from other people life.
13 04 11
Have a bless night!
February 3rd, 2011, is Chinese New Year, supposed to be a very very very happy event for me. However, this year, not so happy for me, since my grandma (from my father) passed away last year, so I kinda miss her, miss to hug her, miss to make her smile, miss her shout when I'm doing bad.
However, what I don't expect is, a very very humiliate and disrespect behavior (from my own opinion) coming from a very very very inside person from my mother family members, and forgive me, for I can't accept such attitude.
Normally, when my late grandma still alive, the route on that big day is going to my grandma (from my mother) firstly, then after two hours there, we go to the next stop, my late grandma house. So, we arrived very early on the first grandma's house, thus, we don't meet many family members.
This year, we go on the normal route, because it is what we know, and we didn't ever think to change it, besides, I'm borrowing my aunt's car, so I should be there before 12 pm, my aunt need to visit other relatives house also, as a routine tradition.
So, when we visited on my first grandma's house, we stayed there for around 2 hours, and then we're preparing to leave to the next stop, guess what my aunts (from my mother side) said out loud to my mother in front of everyone including my father, "Sis, why you have to leave so soon? your mother in-law is not there anymore". There... I stopped to do everything I should do behind the steer wheel for a moment, and I can feel my eyes open so wide of shock, even my cousins heard it shouted to his mother "whooooaaaaa". I don't want to look again just move the car backward and wave hand then left.
I realize later, that the other aunt asking me while I am exiting the toilet "when you will go after this?" I said, "to PIK", and then she asked "why? grandma is not there anymore", then I just said " I have to return the car anyway, I borrow it", I never ever ever think her questions is a negative one on the first place, but now I know.
You see, blame me for who I am, I am a very conservative person, but that does not mean you have to leave good manner aside if you are not a conservative one, am I right? that's the difference between human and animal right? my aunts are not animal, right?
Then now, I can't help to think that they are the worst persons I have ever knew in my life so far, Jesus Christ, it's not my grandma passed away thousand years ago, it's only last year, not counting that it is not even a year, yet. So, I should just forget her? erase her from my memory? never consider that she even ever exist in this world? what they were thinking when they said that? have they ever felt sorry after saying that? Do they know that it might break my father heart when he heard it?
I complaint about it to my mom, and she just said, just let it go, don't take their words in your heart, but how can I not to? my mom also said then you don't be like them, I said in my heart, off course I'm not, I'm not that crazy as they are. But, who will let them know that what they said is wrong and might turn their words to themselves, who? the reason I complaint to my mom is to make my mom teach them a lesson. But it never happened.
So, please don't ever asking me to have respect on those aunts, mom, because they don't respect all of the people I loved at all. Maybe, they even don't respect you as their big sister, mom.
Perhaps I should feel pity on all person close to my aunts, don't ever think that my aunts will feel sorrow when you are dead, because they will forget you the next day after you have been buried or cremated, and they already have fun at all malls in Jakarta. for my other grandma, did you scold them when you heard that also on that day? maybe I will be the one who remember you in my heart also, not them. Don't expect them to come to Cimone when you have gone also, grandma.
The world is really really change now, not in a good direction, but in a bad direction, just be prepared for the worst. The humanity will extinct, soon.
God, I am sorry, I do not have the courage to forgive and forget them right now, maybe after a hundred years, because I have a very good memories and it last long in my brain.
:'(
so, be carefull on each words comes out from your mouth, or it will come back to you....
Gosh, I even cried when edited this :''(
Just finished read The Nymph King, a novel from great author, Gena Showalter.
When reading this, another parallel life is open again for me, he he
A great idea I think, considering that in a real life, the percentage between man and woman alive is un balance, the women are too much now. so..... where should we search another man beside the human? here they are: the nymph, vampire, sorcerer, Greek's God.
I guess all the authors who make novels with all the above genre do think about it, the unbalance thing.
and the women agree with it, you can see all women around the world dream can be pick as Edward Cullen's bride, and wishing Bella to step aside ha ha ha
well, for me, thank you, I am not a fan of vampire, but a nymph, hmph, they were describe just like human, just have the ability beyond human. I think I can consider nymph ;P
Fascinating isn't it? how a mind can create such a wonderful possibilities, that who knows can be real, some day, one day.
Have a productive week, just like Vin said, and make lots of novel that can impress me, and I'll read it.
28 02 11
lynn
Another movie with a great message to deliver, and another thoughts to think also.
A story of one man's life, that God is really love him, and give him a second chance in life. A chance to change his bad way into good way. Sometimes, not every movie giving the same end, well this one, I like it.
Some other movies, will shown that a bad teacher will stay survive at the end because he/she realize what he/she had done wrong all this time and turn to be a good person in the end, while the student, that firstly is a good one, but by the bad lessons he/she got from that teacher, became evil and turn to be the one who must be terminate in the end of the movie.
So sad isn't it? from my opinion, the teacher is the one who should be terminate in the end, why? because he/she is the root of all the things happen in the front. The teacher should repair all the things including changing his/her student into good again.
This movie shown it, because if not, that will be unfair.
Curious enough? just watch the movie he he he
While seeing this movie remind me of my final destination, hmph, any recommendation where to find the temple or church, for female nun?
Have a great days ahead, friends.
7 02 11
I WILL ALWAYS BE HOPING, HOPING.
YOU WILL ALWAYS BE HOLDING,
HOLDING MY HEART IN YOUR HAND.
I WILL UNDERSTAND.
I WILL UNDERSTAND SOME DAY, ONE DAY.
YOU WILL UNDERSTAND ALWAYS,
ALWAYS FROM NOW UNTIL THEN.
WHEN IT WILL BE RIGHT, I DON'T KNOW.
WHAT IT WILL BE LIKE, I DON'T KNOW.
WE LIVE IN HOPE OF DELIVERANCE
FROM THE DARKNESS THAT SURROUNDS US.
HOPE OF DELIVERANCE,
HOPE OF DELIVERANCE,
HOPE OF DELIVERANCE
FROM THE DARKNESS THAT SURROUNDS US.
(from the darkness that surrounds us)
AND I WOULDN'T MIND KNOWING, KNOWING
THAT YOU WOULDN'T MIND GOING,
GOING ALONG WITH MY PLAN.
WHEN IT WILL BE RIGHT, I DON'T KNOW.
WHAT IT WILL BE LIKE, I DON'T KNOW.
WE LIVE IN HOPE OF DELIVERANCE
FROM THE DARKNESS THAT SURROUNDS US.
HOPE OF DELIVERANCE,
HOPE OF DELIVERANCE,
HOPE OF DELIVERANCE
FROM THE DARKNESS THAT SURROUNDS US.
(from the darkness that surrounds us)
HOPE OF DELIVERANCE,
HOPE OF DELIVERANCE,
HOPE OF DELIVERANCE
FROM THE DARKNESS THAT SURROUNDS US.
- Paul McCartney -
For all my precious that I care the most in this world, you are my strength to face the next days and this filthy world. I will remember this, every time the self ego comes out and want to walk away, so you all will never be suffer. Your happiness is my true happiness.
maeve lynn
What do they see that I don't see ... in me?
Should I be the one who know myself really are, shouldn't I?
Then why? they're telling me that I'm good in what I do, then shouldn't they appreciate me and my result with good and fair compensation, not just with their words?
Also, how do they know I am that good if they're not even check all my results? what if there are many mistakes I have done in it, will I be that same good in their eyes and mind?
well, have done a mistake that not entirely caused by me, but, I got the biggest slap. Maybe, this is what fair means in their world, not mine.
Fiuuuh, I'm just an ordinary person, that doing an ordinary task and produce an ordinary result. So many people below me, but so much people above me too. So, please, don't add up more and more burden, it is already as high as a mountain from where I see.
Maybe .... in this case ... I'm the idiot ... can be fooled by them.
Hopefully, O God, I really do hope and pray, that for the last choice that I'll make, is not a mistake anymore, but it's the right one, the everlasting and the peaceful one. That I'll do happily for the rest of my days ahead. Make my mind more clever in choosing than I used to. Amen.
P.s.
at this moment, just this moment, really want to throw all the task to the wall, and walking away... why just this moment? because I know tomorrow they'll already stuck up on my back tidily.
Friends, thank you for still at my side, because whenever I'm with you all, I know that I 'll be far from stress and other trouble that haunting me.
Good night and sleep tight
20 01 11
lynn
